Is it true that a relationship can only survive if the sex is good? Does all the cooing, caring, love, emotions, etc. boil down to just one aspect – physical togetherness? Once that level is reached; all the care and emotions take a sidetrack.
Have you ever felt that being in a relationship for many months and having slept together, the care and emotions that you felt before sex are gone? You are often left confused about your stand in the relation after the sexual line is crossed. Usually all the problems in a relation start to emerge once you have slept together. Isn’t that what happened with Adam and Eve as well?
It takes a lot of effort to sustain a relation and actually survive through joys and sorrows. The vows that people take in a wedding are also forgotten if the sex goes away from the marriage. Makes you think, is it the orgasm that keeps the relation going and you occasionally mistaken it for love?
I do not deny the fact that several people do have a purely platonic relation, but how rare are those or should I say how gay are those? Unless your opposite sex friend is a gay or lesbian, you cannot deny having sexual fantasies for them.
Having being in many relationships, I got to think about what was the ultimate goal of my relations.
Most of the time it was not sex at all. I do not deny the physical spark that came up occasionally but things seemed just right the way they were. Maybe that is the reason that none of the relationships lasted longer. Still I want to believe that sex is not the ULTIMATE in any relationship… The ultimate goal is Friendship and if you can find true companionship in your partner, you are a lucky person… Sex comes afterwards. To make a relationship stronger it is very important to understand that lust cannot drive a relation, it has to be something more than that…..it has to be an eternal feeling of long lasting companionship and sharing that will make you want to live with that person forever. A relationship has many emotions attached to it and sex should not be just about getting an orgasm, it should be an expression of love. When two people truly believe that they are meant to be together, sex becomes love making and is beautiful and without any guilt.
LOVE is the reality created by God which is supposed to be beautiful, caring, sweet, understanding and most important forever lasting. Look for a friendship in your partner, a bonding of emotions and not just hormones.
You need to decide what it is that you truly want – A Love Relationship or Plain Sex? From all the lovers out there, I wish you love and happiness with the partner of your dreams for whom you’ll have the highest regard and admiration… enough to love them completely and to see sex as the beginning of your union together….and not as an end goal.
Mary / I think sniethmog that all people need to realize when in a relationship is that every day each person is changing. They and you may wake up a different person every day. However, if you truly love this person, you love them at their core. Their core is solid. That IS who they really are. I have been in a relationship with the same man for over a decade now and we are constantly evolving. I think our openness to allowing our relationship to evolve is what keeps us together. We’ve seen some hard times, but we both knew that we truly loved each other. He is patient with my decisions and I with his. I see many relationships fail because as soon as one person shows interests in sniethmog new or “different” the other person, out of fear, throws them out of the boat. I think open communication is the key. (Sounds so cliche, but it’s true.) Really put your feelings and thoughts out there, so your partner can know you better. The good and the bad. Being with someone for an extended period of time has wonderful benefits. I feel so connected to my partner. Sometimes I feel like we’re the same person. And that wouldn’t have happened if I had just moved on as soon as our relationship got difficult. News flash! Relationships are difficult at times! But they are also beautiful.